Things I Don’t Want to Do at Corporate Conferences

If I never have to witness spontaneous dancing at a corporate event again, I will live a long, fulfilled life.

You know the moment. It’s right after lunch, conversations are happening naturally, people are easing back in… and then, for reasons no one can explain, someone decides THIS is the perfect moment.

The music blasts out of nowhere. The uplights flip to magenta. The MC yells, “Everybody up!” Your enthusiastic coworker starts clapping while approximately 92% of the room glances at each other like, are we actually doing this?

And it’s always the same look. Half polite, half confused and a little resigned.

Some people stand because they don’t want to be the only one sitting. Some stay seated and suddenly become very invested in their phones. But I promise you, nobody feels more connected. We just all collectively agree to participate so it’s over faster.

I believe in connection. I believe in intentional activities. What I don’t believe in is manufacturing hype to compensate for weak design.

Corporate conferences don’t need louder music. They need better architecture. If we need to yell at executives to stand up and move, something went wrong hoursss ago. And by something went wrong, it's usually the 7:00 a.m. start, the 8.5 hours of slides, a sad basement ballroom, and zero white space.

Or maybe it’s the back to back sessions with no breathing room or the rehearsed, agreeable panel that went 20 minutes over.

That’s not a low energy crowd. That’s a drained one and drained people don’t need to be hyped. They need a professional MC (not your funny coworker), conversations that move decisions forward, agendas that respect their intelligence and hospitality that makes them glad they came, NOT relieved it’s over.

Engagement isn’t something you demand, it’s something you earn. And when something is thoughtfully designed, I promise you, people will lean in on their own.

They will stay after. They will keep talking at dinner. And hey, they might even dance.

But it will happen because the room feels alive, not because someone panicked and turned the volume up.

So in conclusion… please stop enthusiastically pointing at me when the music starts.